Motherhood changes who you understand yourself to be and can cause you to question who you are as you go through the transition. Your identity is altered in such a drastic way that you may feel like you are losing yourself. It can be tough to go through the identity crisis thinking that you are the only one (like I did); however, it is more common than you think. Here is to navigating an identity shift of becoming a mom.
I remember feeling lost! I loved being with my daughter, I had resigned from my job when I was still pregnant so I could be a stay at home mom. Fast forward to the early days of motherhood where I started regretting my decision (I still cannot believe that I can now say that out loud without feeling knots in my stomach). Being there with my daughter was a joy but I missed cultivating all the other parts of my identity. I missed:
- Going to work
- Having free time
- Doing my hair and nails
- Working towards my dreams and goals
I remember saying to myself “This is not how I am supposed to feel!”, “This is not how it is supposed to be! Moreover, I felt very ashamed of my thoughts and my feelings that I didn’t share them with anyone. The guilt of wanting to be away from my daughter was too much.
I am so glad that now I understand that loving and showing up for my daughter does not mean abandoning myself. Navigating the identity shift of becoming a mom needs you to be gentle with yourself as you integrate your known identity with your identity as a mom.
I share about what you can do as you navigate your identity shift in motherhood in today’s episode of the Transition to Motherhood Series. Watch it with an open mind and you will learn:
- To embrace your new identity as a mom without feeling like you are losing yourself
- The importance of taking care of yourself as a mom and the role self-care plays in finding your identity
- Why slowing down is a good thing and
- You are not the only mom who is experienced or is experiencing an Identity Crisis.
Take the insights that you got from today’s Transition to Motherhood episode and use it in your own journey. I believe that motherhood was not designed to tame you.
What has navigating your own identity shift as a mom been like?